The summer holidays are very nearly over, and parents everywhere are either relishing the last of the quality family time or counting down the seconds until autumn term begins.
Either way, the goal will be to ease into the new school year as seamlessly as possible, avoiding tantrums and ensuring little ones set off happy, well-fed and ready to learn.
This week, Supernanny Jo Frost shared her thoughts on the importance of a good morning routine, calling out ‘performative’ parents who vlog their family as they start their day to post on social media.
‘A time when family connection should be at its most highest, a smooth operation of a well practiced routine of breakfast together, life skills accomplished, a mindset of focus and attention, and the privilege to be educated,’ said the Channel 4 star.
‘It is bad enough seeing how many parents are dependent on iPads and screens in the morning as babysitters, turning into bad habits and chaotic mornings, but please, now this?’
Getting properly set up for the day is vital for kids’ long-term development, but turning your morning schedule into a well oiled machine (rather than a chaos-filled mess) can be just as beneficial for us adults, as well as for overall family dynamics.
To help make this transition as smooth as possible, we spoke to Dr Dr Selina Warlow of The Nook Clinic. As a clinical psychologist specialising in neurodiversity, she knows all about how hard it can be to balance your child’s emotions with practical needs like getting out the door on time.
Here, she offers her top tips for a morning routine that does just that, allowing everyone in your household to set off for school or work without a hitch.
Prep everything the night before
Take the pressure off your mornings by getting as much as possible ready at bedtime.
‘Lay out school uniform ready for the next day and help your child to pack their school bag,’ Dr Warlow tells Metro.co.uk. ‘It can also be helpful to have a basket for each child by the front door when they come home from school where they can drop their coat, bag and shoes.’
This way, you just need to pick everything back up again from the same spot, and there’s less chance of them losing the essentials.
Overestimate your timings
‘No one enjoys rushing around in the morning or being late,’ says Dr Warlow. ‘So, ensure you give everyone plenty of time to get ready, which may mean setting an alarm 15 minutes earlier than you would to give space for the morning routine to be done slowly and calmly.’
We know hitting the snooze button can be tempting, but it’s not worth starting your day frazzled because you tried to cut it fine. During these first few days of term, time how long the whole schedule takes, then give yourself extra leeway going forward.
Do kids really have it easier these days?
According to a new study by Amazon Chatterbox, 69% of parents think their children have it easier at school now than they did when they were pupils.
Over half claimed this was due to technology, while 14% said teachers were less strict nowadays, while 10% cited easier homework.
However, parenting expert Kirsty Ketley refuted this, saying: ‘I understand where parents are coming from, but you could argue kids today have it harder, it’s just a different type of hard. People think smartphones are making life easier for today’s children, but I actually think it’s the opposite.’
She also says that ‘there’s a lot more pressure on kids these days to achieve,’ recommending parents show understanding for the struggles young people face, and ‘listen without projecting in order to best support them.’
Make room for a snuggle
While getting dressed, brushing teeth, and eating breakfast are neccessary, nothing beats a little downtime with your little ones, so try to factor this in.
‘Jump into bed with your child and give them a snuggle,’ Dr Warlow advises. ‘If they want to talk you could ask them what they are looking forward to about their day. They may also want to use this time to talk through any worries that they may have.’
That 10 or 15 minutes of chatting together is invaluable, and puts kids in the right frame of mind to enjoy their day.
Warm up the transition from bed
Dr Warlow explains: ‘If it is cold outside, a warm drink can help with the transition from a nice warm bed to getting ready. Or having a soft bathrobe or blanket can help a child with coming downstairs to breakfast.’
It seems simple, but nobody wants to get out of a toasty bed, so these small things make the prospect of getting ready a little less bleak.
Choose a healthy breakfast
The benefits of a healthy breakfast are well documented, with easy dishes like overnight oats, beans or tomatoes on toast, omelettes and fruit-topped granola giving kids all the nutrients they need to last until break time.
‘Eating is also a great time for a child to sit down and think about the day ahead,’ adds Dr Warlow.
Although some children may want to sit quietly, others may want to talk, so follow their lead.
Use a checklist
A checklist takes the guess-work out of mornings, and avoids those frustrating moments where you’re expected to cobble together costumes or home economics ingredients in a matter of minutes.
‘Having a checklist can help a child to get ready independently while they check off what they need,’ says Dr Warlow.
She advises going through what’s coming up for the following day with your child – for example, a PE lesson or a permission slip – and noting down the items they need. Then, they can work through each thing without forgetting the essentials.
Keep things light
‘Keeping positive and praising your child for getting their morning routine done will set the tone for a positive day,’ says Dr Warlow.
Creating this sort of atmosphere may include writing positive affirmations (such as ‘I am brave’ or ‘I am enough’) on a post-it note on the fridge or putting a message on your child’s mirror to help them to focus on these during the day – especially useful if they’re feeling nervous about something.
Similarly, turning getting ready into a game like ‘beat the buzzer’ helps children who have difficulty with time management and ensures the routine is fun rather than a chore.
A fun playlist of music you all love can also ‘create a feeling of calm or get everyone up and dancing in the kitchen.’
Create an open atmosphere to talk
Dr Warlow explains: ‘Many children can feel worried about aspects of school or particular things coming up in their school day. For some children they want to talk about these before bed and for others they might want to talk on the walk or drive to school.
‘The most important thing is to make sure there is space for your child to have these conversations with you, so they feel heard and supported. Find a space that works for you and your family.’
If these worries are ongoing or your child begins to show signs of school refusal, she recommends talking to the school or seeking professional support from a psychologist or counsellor.
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