‘I lost my job and had to go into hiding after Wife Swap’

A woman who appeared on Wife Swap USA 20 years ago has revealed the fallout of the show left her unemployed and forced her family into ‘hiding’.

Amy Beaver starred on the first series of the reality programme, which saw families from very different backgrounds swap wives for two weeks.

Having come from a very liberal, progressive, animal-loving family consisting of her husband Jeff and their young daughter Emily, she was left stunned (and often in tears) to live with traditional Southern husband Glenn Smoak and his two children Eli and Addie, while his wife Aletha moved into the Beaver household.

At the time, Amy knew little about reality TV formats and went in ‘very blindly’, while Jeff – who had never been apart from his wife of 32 years before – was apprehensive but ‘really excited’ for what was to come.

However, they had no idea what the fallout from the show would entail.

In an interview with , marking 20 years since Wife Swap USA first hit screens, Emily, now 30, explained: ‘There was a period of time after it happened where we didn’t watch it because the after-effects were challenging at times.

‘When it first aired, it was not as acceptable to be a more progressive, left-leaning family, so once that changed, and once the episode came out it became more clear that we’re living in a time where if this would have aired during the time that we’re living in now, it would have been a completely different response to our family.’

While remarking that the family can now watch the episode back and ‘laugh’ and that it made for ‘excellent TV’, Amy revealed that the show was so badly received in 2004 that they had to move home.

She told us: ‘It wasn’t well received at that time, we had some incidents happen where we had to move and I lost my job.

‘It wasn’t told on the show what I did, but I was a school teacher and I worked with special education children, and we didn’t know who was going to come to our house, so it was kind of a group decision that we would just say I didn’t work.’

‘So it was difficult how it was all received, and we did go into hiding for a little while after that,’ she went on.

Amy continued: ‘We just sold everything we had, and we moved into an apartment, and we just laid low because everything passes, and it was less than a year before we were able to just go out and do regular things like buy toilet paper again, that died down very quickly.’

The family were supported by production, Amy said, recalling the crew as ‘great’ and ‘understanding’, which left them with a ‘really good experience’.

‘At that time, I received a lot of phone calls from production, and they were really supportive. They really could hear me, they really heard my needs. So I feel like overall, it was just a really, really good experience. Our crew was great, our production assistants were incredible, our directors were incredible,’ she said.

‘It was very interesting how quickly I feel like I developed a bond with those people, and the thing I regret about having done the show is because I feel like I did bond with these folks, and then I couldn’t see them again, so I don’t know and where any of them are. So this really supportive, really incredible staff of people we worked with, we don’t talk to.

‘So that’s the one thing that  I do hate about that sort of experience is that you have to let go of some people, some really good people.’

Now the family have gained fame through TikTok, where Emily has found a loyal fandom who love her crochet creations. They admitted that it’s ‘nice to be recognised for something other than Wife Swap, even though it is exciting when people come up to us and talk about that as well’.

One of the most memorable moments of the episode, which many fans remember now and comment on Emily’s TikToks, was when they discover Amy was ‘that liberal mom’ who ‘was so right the entire time’, saw the mum in tears over realising that the Smoaks – who loved to hunt – had a real deer head mounted on their living room wall.

She was left sobbing, and calling out to the deer: ‘All creatures belong to god, I’m sorry!’

But Amy was faced with another challenge when she first saw the home, which had a Confederate flag flying outside.

Recalling those moments, she said: ‘When I originally saw the episode, I really laughed at myself and at the situation, because it was just such a difficult situation to be in. So I thought it was really funny, I thought a lot of stuff that happened was really funny.

‘Crying over the deer head is such an over the top reaction to have, and I personally thought it was hilarious when they aired that.’

Since then, the family have made it clear they do make light over those instances, even creating satirical YouTube videos referencing them.

She did however raise concerns over ‘editing’ the final table scene, which saw the two couples meet each other after their time apart, and the wives come face to face.

‘They wouldn’t let us talk to one another to find out what was going on, what had happened in our household, so hearing things for the first time were very jarring,’ Amy explained.

‘Aletha was pretty combative at the time, and said some things that were not shown that were very triggering for me. I had not had much sleep, I had not seen my husband, I had no idea how my child was, I was not allowed to know those things.’

She added that she was left having a ‘full blown panic attack’ in the stressful situation, when all she wanted to do was see her child.

Meanwhile, Jeff found it ‘very distressing’ watching some of what Amy went through, including moments she was close to quitting, especially when she was surrounded by the extended Smoak family but still felt ‘intensely alone’.

He told us: ‘It was very distressing, for sure, especially being something that’s out of your control, and emotionally draining, because I really wanted to make her know that Emily was okay, but you really aren’t even allowed to talk before we sat down at the table, so there wasn’t even time for me to say anything to her.

‘It was literally we saw each other, sat down at the table and started a conversation, so it was very quick. So I really did not like that aspect of it, but it’s makes for dramatic TV, for sure.’

He indicated that it was difficult watching the American flag story back, after Aletha insisted a flag was also put up in the Beaver household, despite it going against all of his beliefs.

Jeff, who served as a combat veteran, which was not revealed in the show, continued: ‘Watching it back for me, the American flag story was… I too am appreciative of us being able to now let people understand who we are as a family.

‘Because some of the things help people understand who we are and the type of people we are, so it brings a lot of clarity to people as they go back and now watch that episode.’

Despite the aftermath of filming Wife Swap USA, the family insisted they enjoyed their time on the show, with Emily saying she would even do it all over again in the future.

And although they shared their fair few differences with the Smoaks, the families are still in contact, and the Beavers wouldn’t have changed their experience with them at all.

‘I think that our episode was very unique and it addressed a lot of issues that are issues now, and what I do appreciate about the relationship that we kept with the Smoaks is that it’s not adversarial, like they’re accepting of who we are and we’re accepting of who they are, and just recognizing that you’re from different parts of the country and belief systems, and not trying to change someone, just being like, okay, that’s where we are,’ Jeff said.

Amy added: ‘It’s a testament in today’s political environment that people with vastly different opinions and beliefs can still love each other. And I think that’s a really important message, and I love that that’s what we’ve taken away from this experience.’