I’m a wine expert and this £4.99 bottle from Aldi is perfect for Halloween

I live for the scary, spooky, horrifying things in life, that’s why I’m in entertainment. And by entertainment, I mean I write Metro’s drinks column and appear on TV, where you get to see some pretty eyebrow-raising stuff behind the scenes.

But hands down the scariest thing on earth is when companies bring out novelty, limited-edition Halloween products alongside a press release with the word ‘spooktacular’ in the title. You know who you are. Maybe it’s more cringy than scary, but it’s still nightmarish enough to give me an involuntary chill down my spine, in all the wrong ways.

Even Colin the Caterpillar can’t catch a break, bless him, he’s getting a ‘spinetingling’ and ‘creepy’ glow-up (or down) complete with red-coloured buttercream when you cut him open. Last year, they mummified him, which must have made things awkward with Connie. No one wants to be bandaged up in front of their other half, it’s not a flattering look.

Luckily, the novelty treatment doesn’t happen too often in the wine world, as there’s not enough money in it. So, when it does come about, you know the research and development team have been getting pretty creative and there’s some budget behind it.

But how Halloweeny can a wine get? Well, aside from spooktacular (sorry) labels, some wines naturally have a ‘bloody’ taste to them, complete with an iron and iodine notes. Perhaps ‘meaty’ ‘gamey’ or ‘savoury’ are better flavour descriptors, which you’ll find in Syrah and Mourvèdre from the Rhône Valley. Speaking of ‘gamey’, which is generally sweeter and softer than ‘meaty’, aged Pinot Noir takes on a ‘brace of pheasants hanging in the pantry’ kind of aroma. It’s better than it sounds, trust me.

Also, decent wine is being made in the Transylvania region of Romania, and believe me, they don’t half play on the Dracula theme in their gift shops over there. And don’t forget, last year 19 Crimes actually buried 100 bottles of red wine in a casket placed 6-feet under in a Victorian cemetery in Tower Hamlets, with the bottles unearthed with a priest present. An exorcist apparently says the wines might still be haunted, which is worrying as I still have a bottle at home. I knew I should have stuck to spirits.

Anyway, if you’re dead set on buying a wine with a creepy theme, here are a the good, bad and the downright scary.  

Looking to pick something up for a Halloween party, but don’t want to spend a fortune? Aldi’s Reprobates is the perfect option. This red wine is from South Australia, made from Grenache, Syrah and Mourvèdre and I actually prefer it to the strikingly similar (but more expensive) 19 Crimes. Plus, it has a limited-edition glow in the dark part on the label for Halloween.

We all know the flavour profile of 19 Crimes red by now. Sweet, plush fruit underpinned by mocha and chocolate notes. Although it’s not for me, every wine has its place and this is simple to understand and appealing to newbies. As far as I know, no cemeteries or caskets have been involved in the ageing of this wine. But what a surprise though, this also has a limited-edition Halloween edition glow-in-the-dark label…

As well as this spooky 19 Crimes drink, there’s also 19 Crimes The Uprising (grim reaper), which is a red aged for 30 days in rum barrels, so I like that they’re trying to do something different here. It also has a slightly unusual grape in the blend, by the name of Durif aka Petite Syrah. This grape is plummy, also adding in a pop of black pepper when blended with jammy and spicy Grenache and Syrah.

Based in deepest Barossa, this is made from an unusual blend of Durif, old-vine Cabernet Sauvignon and Touriga Nacional, aka the Portuguese grape that makes port. Not only that, but the Touriga has been aged in a Solera system as they do in Sherry. Barrels are placed on top of each other, youngest at the top, filling the barrels below as the wine is siphoned off at the bottom. The result is a rich and mellow wine with a dad-joke inspired name.

The label makes you think of eating live bats for breakfast, but the wine inside couldn’t be more opposite. It’s a laid back mosh pit full of velvety and chocolatey with silky damsons and a soupcon of spicy French oak. This is a collaboration with the eponymous band, well, lead singer Bruce Dickinson is an airline pilot and has a PHD in history, so winemaking was bound to be next.

Think Argentina is only about Malbec? Until recently, you’d be right, but now there’s a whole array of exciting new grapes in their repertoire. Take this wine, it’s a blend of Shiraz, Cabernet Sauvignon and Malbec, made by a Malbec magician by the name of Opi Sadler. Think spice, blackcurrant and high-cacao-content chocolate.

Named after a nasty bend in the river Tamar, located in the east coast of Tasmania. But I’m going with a demon theme, given it’s Halloween. The grapes are harvested from sites all over the cool-climate island, bringing morello cherry and wild raspberry notes into this Hermés silk scarf of a wine.

This wine has nothing to do with Halloween apart from the skeleton on the label. Though, I suppose the wine is a particularly rich shade of purple (hence the name), which is gothic-adjacent and could look like blood if you closed your eyes. Flavour-wise, it’s super ripe due to the predominance of Zinfandel in the blend with a smidge of Petit Syrah. Well, I suppose the winemakers’ motto is ‘fun label, serious wines’, so…

Another Australian corker, though this time at the upper end of the price spectrum. 96% Shiraz with 4% Viognier, this wine is plumtastic with flecks of cassis, milk chocolate and fudge. The project is owned by Virgin Wines, designed to make small-scale, disruptive and interesting wines from McLaren Vale-grown grapes. The juice is co-fermented with Viognier skins, making it super aromatic and complex.

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