Sian Welby has encouraged individuals “not to be scared” when it comes to visiting family members affected by dementia.
The 38-year-old presenter from This Morning recently shared her personal experience with her father, Jim’s diagnosis of vascular dementia. The condition, which impacts approximately 180,000 individuals in the UK, is characterised by reduced blood flow to the brain leading to cognitive impairments.
In a conversation with Anna Richardson on the podcast It Can’t Just Be Me, Sian addressed the challenges that families face when a loved one is affected by dementia. She emphasised the importance of maintaining a presence in the person’s life.
Sian said: “Something I would like to get across is for people not to be scared of it because I think, because it’s our dads, we’re really close to it and connected to it. When it is grandads and you’re one step removed, there’s a bit like ‘oh, I don’t want to go and visit him because it confuses him’.”
She recounted a recent discussion with a new mother who was hesitant about bringing her child to see the grandfather due to concerns he wouldn’t recognise them. Sian advised: “I went ‘oh just go, go and see him, make his day, even if he calls you Kate and your name is Jane, just be that person that he will know, no matter what, that someone came to visit him that day.”, reports the Express.
“Whatever he makes of that moment, it will have added some joy and spice to that afternoon. So my message has been to people, whatever stage they’re at, really just embrace it.”
Sian, set to feature on Saturday Kitchen with her Capital Breakfast colleagues Chris Stark and Jordan North this morning (Saturday, November 30), emphasises the importance of acknowledging that dementia can “change” a person. She advocates for “embracing” loved ones and striving to understand them as they are now.
She elaborated: “It’s one of those things where we’ve talked about the scary or terrifying stages of dementia but for now, if you are living in the moment, whether it’s your dad, your grandad, your wife, your partner, we are seeing it in younger and younger people and it’s a case of don’t dwell on who they were. Be in the moment, embrace who they are now, and be patient.
“I don’t tend to correct my dad, I let him tell me a story. I’ll maybe only correct him if he goes round and round on the same topic, I’ll maybe say ‘oh yeah dad, you did actually say that’.”
During an appearance on This Morning earlier in the year, Sian discussed how her father’s “independence” had been impacted by dementia. She recounted: “He was such a practical ‘can do it’ man, I never went to an MOT thinking the car would because my dad would fix it.
“He could do plumbing, he could build shelves, and we started noticing he started struggling with the problem solving element of things like that, that he’d normally be able to just solve. So he relies on everybody a lot more.”
Helen, Sian’s mother, first noticed something was amiss when Jim began to repeat questions in quick succession. It wasn’t long before the family realised that Jim’s memory was deteriorating.
Sian discovered that engaging Jim in hands-on activities, like painting a cupboard, helped him to “stay in the moment” and converse more naturally. However, with no cure for dementia, the harsh reality is that Jim’s condition will worsen over time.
“Eventually you’re going to become strangers,” Sian admits. “Even the thought of it makes me cry now because the thought of someone like your own dad not knowing who you are, the thought that you’re going to walk into a room and they’ll be like ‘who are you? Do I know you? ‘ and it is so possible, is heartbreaking.”