A woman has been left baffled after her fiancé’s ex-girlfriend requested to give a speech at their upcoming wedding, and the groom’s family are backing her.
The bride-to-be, understandably, declined the ex’s request, but she is still eager to speak, while her future mother-in-law has accused the bride of being “oversensitive” for not wanting the ex to have a speaking role on the big day.
On Reddit’s popular Am I The A**hole (AITA) forum, she shared: “My fiancé was dating ‘Katy’ for years then they broke it off. She still comes around since she’s close to his family. By how much time they had spent together, Katy seems to know my fiancé really well.
“That didn’t bother me at first, but it became an issue when she asked that I let her give a speech at the wedding since she knows him well, and wanted to tell a ‘few funny’ stories about him.”
The woman said this request made her feel “extremely uncomfortable” so she apologised and told Katy she didn’t think it was “appropriate” for her to deliver a speech. Then, her future mother-in-law “got involved and started lecturing” her, telling her she needed to “stop being negative”.
The bride-to-be vented about the awkward situation: “[She] claimed I was making this ‘about me’ (but it’s my wedding!) My fiancé is choosing to stay out of it, but the pressure is on me now.
“I’m being called ‘oversensitive’ and [told I need] to ‘loosen up’ as this could be a good opportunity to add more laughter and joy to the event, but to be completely honest on here, I don’t want his ex to take any part in our wedding, even if she’s a friend of the family and they’ve known her since she was a teenager.”
Reddit users offered their verdict. One posted: “NTA everyone here is varying degrees of w***er. Katy should grow a brain, no it’s not appropriate for her to speak at your wedding. Mother-in-law needs to butt out! Husband-to-be needs to grow a damn spine and support you.
“I’d be furious with them right now if I were you. Why are they staying out of it? Can they not see that if you’re uncomfortable with their ex-partner speaking at your wedding then it’s just not going to happen?”
Someone else weighed in: “Exactly, this shouldn’t even be up for debate or discussion in the end it’s YOUR wedding and you get to make the final decision, NTA”.
And a third commented: “It’s bizarre that anyone would think it’s appropriate for an ex to give a speech at a wedding. This is a celebration of her love and future together, not a chance for his ex to relive old memories. She definitely should stand her ground, her feelings are valid and this is her wedding, not a family reunion for his ex.”
Another person chimed in: “Not only is that bizarre, but is anyone else thinking it’s bizarre that the EX is invited to the wedding at all?!?! Like IDC [I don’t care] how close my family members might be to an ex of mine, there is no way they’re being invited to my wedding! They are an ex for a reason!”