Mark Selby has revealed he tried to take his own life as he opened up on his battle with mental illness.
Snooker star Selby revealed he had been battling depression publicly in 2022 following a Masters defeat to Barry Hawkins during a dark spell that also saw his wife, Vikki, diagnosed with breast cancer – and a close family friend pass away from the same condition. Now he is urging tournament organisers and snooker chiefs to do more to support players with their mental health, as he said he’d be willing to walk away from a tournament if he was struggling.
His comments come days after Ronnie O’Sullivan pulled out of defending his Masters crown, which he was due to start by taking on Scotland’s John Higgins, saying that the pressure had become too much for him to handle. O’Sullivan also called on more support for players, adding: “A lot of players suffer in silence.”
Speaking on the BBC, world No.5 Selby said it took him a long time to feel confident enough to open up on his struggles, explaining: “Individual sports are very tough because there’s a lot of pressure. Once you’re out there in that arena you’re on your own. You have nobody else to turn to until after the match. It’s a very tough place.
“I tried to take my own life a couple of times when I was younger. Having lost my dad so young I didn’t know where to turn, I had nobody in my life close enough to turn to to bring me back up. I felt like life wasn’t worth living anymore, my dad was my idol and role model.
“For years I didn’t speak about it because I didn’t feel like I could. Having since spoken about it, if anyone has questions now I feel like it’s the easiest thing in the world to speak about. Being a guy as well a lot of us are embarrassed because we come across as macho and strong. We feel like we shouldn’t show weakness. But if I was to help just one person in the world by speaking out then I’ll feel like I’ve done my job.
“I know deep down that I still love the game, when things are good and I’m playing some good snooker it’s the best play to be out there, especially in a venue like Alexandra Palace. But I know it’s going to happen again at some point, the doctor has said that I’ll never overcome it – I’m just going to learn to live with it better.
“That’s what I’m doing at the moment, but I know at some point that I’ll probably fall off the wagon, but hopefully I’m in a better place mentally to deal with it so I hopefully don’t go as low as I did before. I just appreciate life a bit more.”
Selby believes players should now have access to a mental health specialist at major events, and believes it could stop some stars from pulling out. The Jester from Leicester continued: “I do now (feel more confident in stepping away for his mental health) but back in April I didn’t because I wasn’t in the best place. I still didn’t step away and I went to Sheffield knowing how I was and played in the tournament when I wasn’t ready. If I’m in that position again I will step away and put myself first.
“Sometimes you need someone on site. If you were going through what I was going through and what Ronnie has gone through, you don’t know how you’re going to feel. I could feel okay today and wake up tomorrow feeling absolutely rubbish, really low and not want to play.
“If that’s happening at tournaments you either have to pull out and not play. Or go to speak to this guy after the tournament has finished. If he was there on site at least you could check for availability in the morning, even if it’s only for half an hour that could be the difference between you carrying on in the tournament or not.”
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