There’s nothing quite as uneasy as having a partner whom your parents don’t take to.
It’s pretty common to hope that your significant other will mesh well with key people in your life, such as your parents and siblings. The lack of harmony between loved ones can lead to awkward mealtimes and general family unease.
Usually, any tension is just that – nothing more than a bit of discomfort. You wouldn’t dream of your family deliberately trying to upset or disrespect your partner, nor would you expect your partner to be discourteous towards your family. However, one man was confronted with the stark reality of his family’s disregard when his mother shockingly went out of her way to mistreat his wife.
Sharing his dismay on Reddit, the husband recounted how his mother “never really gotten along” with his wife, and his optimism for their relationship improving post-marriage was shattered during a recent family dinner visit.
Despite being fully aware of his wife’s plant-based diet, his mother failed to accommodate her at all, offering only a “soggy salad” and even ensuring that a vegetable soup had chicken stock in it, rendering it inedible for his wife.
The husband recounted his family dinner ordeal, saying: “My mum invited us over for dinner, which was supposed to be our first meal as a married couple at her house. My mum knows my wife is vegan. Despite that, my mum didn’t prepare a single vegan dish for her. Except for a soggy-looking salad. Even the veggie soup, she added chicken broth to it, to make it ‘tastier’. The rest was all non-vegan stuff like mac and cheese, fried chicken, jambalaya, and banana pudding for dessert – all things my wife can’t eat.”
As he voiced his concerns to his mother, stating that his wife, who he referred to as Olga, had nothing suitable to eat, his mother erupted in anger. She labelled them “disrespectful” and callously remarked that Olga should “eat normally for one day”.
Though Olga was willing to settle for the salad, her husband could not bear the disrespect shown by his mother, and they chose to leave.
Expressing his frustration, he said: “My wife said she didn’t mind just having the salad, but I knew she was just trying to save the day and was fed up with how my mum was treating her, so I thanked my mum and told her we were leaving. My mum freaked out; she blamed us for being disrespectful, and she said she spent hours cooking all that food for me. I told her that’s the issue; she should’ve thought about Olga, too.”
Commenters backed his stance, encouraging him not to doubt himself for defending his wife and calling out his mother’s “passive-aggressive” behaviour while suggesting he maintain only minimal contact with her going forward.
One individual commented: “This was a marriage test, a husband test. Your mum was testing if you’ll prioritise her feelings over your wife. She may not have even consciously known she was doing it, but it was still a test. You passed with flying colours.” Another shared: “Your mother made a point to prepare dishes your wife couldn’t eat, that was very deliberate. Whether this is a problem she has with your wife or with veganism doesn’t really matter, she meant to be disrespectful.”