A woman has been left stunned after discovering her “awesome” boyfriend, who she praised for being “really fun to be around” and having a “kind soul”, still shares a bed with his ex
Unaware of his living situation for “first couple of dates”, she later found out he still lives with his ex who is “waiting for some money to come through” and searching for “somewhere to live”. He also shares children with the ex.
But the real shock came when she discovered he was still sharing a bed with the ex. The woman confessed on Mumsnet: “I stupidly didn’t ask about sleeping arrangements, etc, as I just assumed and trusted being such a thoughtful person that he would have healthy boundaries.” She was dismayed to learn the truth.
The discovery triggered a visceral reaction, as she explained: “I noticed the reaction in my body first, that tight, uncomfortable feeling when an important boundary has been trespassed. Then, I just had a feeling of running and getting out. I have tried to breathe through the feeling to let it wash over me, but it’s not leaving.”
The woman said she felt “blindsided, gutted, naïve and gullible” over her partner’s actions, and is now questioning the future of their relationship. Commenters on her story advised her to “walk away” despite acknowledging the difficulty of the situation.
One said: “Oh dear. You know the answer here. They wouldn’t be sharing a bed if it was over. Walk away.” Others suggested that the couple must still be intimate or harbour feelings for one another.”
“They’re not just sharing a bed as friends,” one said. Another added: “I think you have been blind-sided by your overwhelming feelings for him, which have made you question whether that situation is ok and fine. It isn’t. I would walk away now, then if he’s serious, readdress once he has properly split up [with her].”